The doc put my sample and the dye under the microscope and looked for several seconds. Made another sample, put it under the scope and looked a little longer. Then he turned around and took off his gloves and said "I wish I had better news. I see squamous epithelials and they definitely do not belong there. That would mean squamous cell carcinoma. It is not a death sentence. You are going to beat it."
I could think of nothing to say but "thank you".
I am pretty sure we both made it to the car before I lost it. I never smoked even one cigarette. I have never tried dip even one time. I had a beer every now and then. I just ran a freaking half marathon! WTF? Yes, I said the 'F' word. Those of you that know me well know that for some reason in my 30's I developed an aversion to that word. I just don't use it EVER. Somehow, at that moment it seemed appropriate. I then said "I want a beer". We drove to Red Robin and sat outside, drank beer and cried.
The only other thing I remember saying is "This changes everything". That ended up being something I hit right on the head.
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