Anniversaries galore!!

(wrote this a while back and for some reason never published it.  someone might find something useful here)

With my diagnosis being in February 2011, it seems like every few days or so it is the one-year anniversary of something, first radiation, first chemo, first PET scan.  I haven't posted in a while so I should catch you up.

I have gained most of my weight back.  In fact, I could have probably gained it all back but decided to stay at the 190 mark or so which is about 20 pounds lighter than my old weight.  I must confess that I really wanted to stay at 185 but blew by it so fast that I dropped anchor at 190.  I have been hitting the gym like a madman and running every chance I get.  My body changed dramatically through the ordeal and in a good way.  My wife tells me I am leaner and I have stayed one waist size smaller for the same weight.  However, I do not recommend my weight loss program...

I spent about 8 weeks in swallow therapy.  That little trip started with a very funny phone call.  My phone rings and a very pleasant lady on the other end tells me she is a speech therapist and that I had been referred to her for eating/swallowing issues.  I wasn't the one who complained, I was referred by the cancer clinic so we were both confused.  We started the process with a little interview in which I told her I was fine and if this was as good as swallowing was gonna get, I had already adapted.  I went into the process thinking it was a waste of time and that I was already good.  She convinced me to give things a try.  We did a swallow study which involves turning an X-ray table on it's end, standing in front of it and eating/drinking several different things mixed with barium.  It doesn't taste bad.  It doesn't taste.  If someone hands you a loaded spoon and says "This is applesauce.", that tells you everything you need to know.  "This is a water consistency. This is nectar consistency."  Everything is white and devoid of taste.  The actual x-ray is one of the coolest things I have ever seen.  You can see the "food" get chewed, balled up and swallowed and follow it on the screen into my stomach.  Unfortunately, that is also where the trouble started.

There is a little flap everyone has that, when you swallow, flaps down and seals your airway so you don't inhale food or drink.  Everyone has done this at least once triggering an instant coughing fit.  Unfortunately for me, the nerves that start that coughing fit were fried by radiation meaning I could inhale water, soda or beer (probably beer) and not even know it.  That is not good.  Little pieces of food also tended to hover around an area where I could possibly inhale them.  That started the therapy which involved lots of swallowing.  Sometimes with water.  Most of the time dry and most of the time while doing something wierd with my tongue to make it even harder to swallow.  For a guy that doesn't make enough spit to begin with, it gets hard pretty quick.  After a while we added a little machine I called the ShockMan (crap, most of the people who read this aren't old enough to remember the WalkMan. oh well).  They stick electrodes on my neck and start to crank the juice which tightens whatever muscles they need to make it even harder to swallow.  It's not unpleasant but I don't want to buy one so I can play at home.  My first follow up swallow study showed much improvement but still showed some stuff hanging around.  Six more weeks of therapy and I would have bet you money I was 100% but failed that test too.  Right now we are in a holding pattern:  we are either going to roll with things the way they are or possibly more therapy.